The Corinthian Correspondence, Part 15: 1 Corinthians 7:24-40; "A Single Heart for Troubled Times"

1 Corinthians, Part 15, 7:25-40 “A Single Heart for Troubled Times” In case you haven’t noticed, the Corinthian correspondence is Paul’s pastoral letters. Aren’t you glad for these letters? The Corinthians were real people, dealing with real problems, committing real sins. I don’t know about you, but when I see a Bible verse out and about, it usually comes from either 1 or 2 Corinthians. I think about that great love chapter for example, 1 Corinthians 13. It seems that no matter what kind of wedding it is, 1 Corinthians 13 is recited almost every time. In our passage for today, 1 Corinthians 7:25-40, we’re going to see Paul deal with a very interesting question: what about people engaged to be married? Should they tie the knot, or not? Of all the things Paul could have addressed. Of all the questions the Corinthians wanted answers for, it was this one! As we will see, Paul did not give a direct command from the Lord. However, this is Paul’s divinely informed counsel. In other words, Paul laid out no hard and fast rule in answer to their question. But he took the time to give timeless principles of how Christians should view life and to live their lives to the glory of God, especially in marriage. Like we talked about last week, Paul gave counsel for everybody to serve the Lord in one place or condition in life. In this passage, he is telling the Corinthians to have a single heart, whether one wears a wedding band or not. So let’s jump in at v.25: “Now concerning the betrothed, I have no command from the Lord, but I give my judgment as one who by the Lord’s mercy is trustworthy.” Paul said his judgment, his counsel was wise, reliable, believable. They can trust Paul’s wisdom in this matter. Let me remind us of what we talked about last week regarding God’s call—another place where Paul gave wise counsel. I shared that Paul saw the call of God was the call to salvation, not so much his individualized plan for the life of a Christian. And how we are to live our lives is based on the wisdom found in God’s word. And wisdom is what Paul is giving to the betrothed. Today, we refer to this as engaged. Paul will say that regardless of what a betrothed, or engaged person does--whether he or she breaks off the engagement or gets married, this is not an issue of sin. I mentioned last week, that the will of God is not a vocation, a location or marital status. It is an attitude that says, “Lord, I’m grateful that you saved me and I want to show my gratitude by keeping your commandments. You are my bridegroom--I’m part of the Bride of Christ”--even men are part of his bride! So if Paul’s counsel is reliable and wise for engaged couples, then what is it? Let’s read v. 26 and find out: “I think that in view of the present distress it is good for a person to remain as he is.” Paul’s wisdom to engaged couples? “Don’t.” Why not? Isn’t it God’s will for people to get married? To be fruitful and multiply? Can you imagine a betrothed couple in the Church in Corinth? “Paul, are you kidding us? We are getting married next month. And your ‘wise counsel’ is to turn in the tux, sell the wedding dress, call off the caterer, cancel the preacher. Why, Paul are you saying this?” There were definite reasons for Paul’s wise counsel here, but he couched it in terms of a sense of urgency. Notice that he did not make this a rule for every engaged couple for all time. He qualified it by saying, “in view of the present distress.” This was to be a temporary arrangement. So, what was it led Paul to see this particular time as one of distress? There are 2 reasons: 1 was spiritual and 1 was practical. Paul saw everything through the lenses of spiritual reality. And we can get a clue about this in v.29: “The appointed time has grown very short.” And in v.31: “The present form of this world is passing away. Paul had a conviction: The Lord’s return was oh, so very close. This is what compelled him in his ministry. He wanted to be ready for that day, and he wanted the churches he started and those he mentored to be ready for Christ’s return as well. We can see that Paul was convinced the Lord was coming back in his lifetime when we read the letters he wrote in the order he wrote them. Paul wrote 13 letters over a period of about 15 years. His first 2 letters were to the Thessalonians and in every chapter in 1 Thessalonians and the first chapter in 2 Thessalonians Paul specifically reminds or instructs his readers about the return of Christ. Five years after he wrote these letters, he wrote 1 Corinthians and, again talks about the Lord’s return here. My point in this is that Spirit of God inspired Paul to write his letters with the return of Christ consuming his thoughts. He continually longed for Christ to come back. And here, Paul desperately wanted the Corinthians to join him in his longing and preparing for Christ’s return. And this was such an amazing thing to Paul. We remember he was a sold out Jewish man, longing for the Messiah even as a non-Christian rabbi. And so when the Messiah met him on the road to Damascus, Paul’s world completely changed. One writer described Paul’s understanding of all that Jesus’ death and resurrection brought about this way: “The cross of Christ is the world-shattering event that redefined the character of life in the world, and his resurrection is the clear signal that the end of the world as Paul knew it was close at hand. The Father’s raising of Jesus is the ‘first fruits’ – a guarantee – that assures the full harvest is soon to follow.” The end of the world was coming soon, because Jesus was coming soon, and Paul did not want the Corinthian believers to have anything distract them from being ready. We will see how Paul fleshes out these marriage distractions to those who had hearts in their eyes as we go through these verses today. The second reason Paul desired for engaged Corinthian Christians to refrain from getting married at that time had to do with what Corinth was going through then. Like our world today, Corinth was in a crisis of its own. They were going through a big famine. Economic hard times. Paul in essence says, and I will pose it as a question, “If you get married now, how will you feed your family?” It’s almost as though we can hear those who were under Paul’s pastoral care in his office objecting to his counsel to refrain from marriage like this, “Love will see us through.” With big smiles the couple looks at one another and they say in unison: “We’ll live on love. No problem!” Now those of you who are married, how many of you thought that, if not outright said it? And the pastor smiled at you and said something like, “Just you wait! Love won’t pay the bills or put food on the table!” Isn’t young love grand? So, given the crisis of the hour and his conviction of Christ’s soon return, Paul lays out his counsel of staying single, if possible, in vv.27-38. Paul has something to say about widows as well in vv.39-40 and we will get to that in due time. In vv.27-31, we see Paul sharing the heart of his counsel. He gives the Corinthians divine wisdom found in this passage, summed up in the title of the message: Whether married, single, or engaged: have a single heart—a heart that is undivided and fully devoted to the Lord. In vv.27 to the first part of 29, Paul wants to assure the engaged Corinthian believers that his counsel is wise and getting married is not sinful, even if they don’t take his advice and get married. But based on the reality of the present circumstances--the soon return of Jesus and economic hard times, Paul wanted to let the happy couples know that more trouble than normal lay ahead, but again, it would not be sinful to get married. Let’s read these verses: “Are you bound to a wife? Do not seek to be free. Are you free from a wife? Do not seek a wife. But if you do marry, you have not sinned, and if a betrothed woman marries, she has not sinned. Yet those who marry will have worldly troubles, and I would spare you that. This is what I mean, brothers: the appointed time has grown very short.” The bottom line seems to be, “It’s not sinful to get married now, but is it wise?” In 1 Corinthians 7:29–31 Paul now describes how we need to live our lives. Remember that old song that goes in part like this: “This world is not my home, I’m only passing through?” As we will see here, Paul counseled them, and us, to hold everything we have and are with an open hand. Don’t let our roots grow too deeply. Don’t put all our eggs in one basket--pick a proverb! We need to travel “light” in the world, not bogged down with all that the world offers us. Paul here describes what “traveling light” looks like: “From now on, let those who have wives live as though they had none, and those who mourn as though they were not mourning, and those who rejoice as though they were not rejoicing, and those who buy as though they had no goods, and those who deal with the world as though they had no dealings with it.” What’s Paul saying here? It may sound confusing, unless both husband and wife have a single heart. Marriage is an exclusive relationship, designed to complement and complete one another. In a marriage that truly honors the Lord, Paul says they are “to live as though they did not have not a wife--or husband.” This simply means that one’s spouse is not at the center of one’s life: Christ is. Here is God’s truth in marriage: whether as husbands or wives, we need to be careful that we don’t make our husband or wife the center of our lives, and risk making them idols. Though marriage is an exclusive relationship, it is not to be an idolatrous one. Husbands and wives to follow the Lord, together, with him in the center. We are not to make our marriages the emotional center of our world--as if all depends on the emotional state of our husband or wife. We’ve heard the expression “happy wife, happy life.” Husbands, if that is all we live for, we’ve missed the boat. We don’t live to make our wives happy. It’s great when she is. It’s great when we are happy. But if we have a single heart, we will not be looking for happiness anyway. Joy is what we are after. And guess who cannot give us joy? Our husband or wife. Joy is part of the fruit of the spirit. Joy is sourced in the Lord. If both husband and wife have single hearts, they will find their joy in the Lord. They will not expect their spouse to provide something they cannot truly give. The most they can give is happiness. And how long does that last? Til the next emotional change. Paul mentioned mourning here as well. If I have a single heart, my world does not fall apart when Kitty mourns. And if she has a single heart, her world does not fall apart when I mourn. As in joy, Christ is the ultimate source of comfort when we mourn. Our wife, our husband can certainly assist, but we cannot look to them to be the ultimate comfort when our world comes crashing in on us. Now we come to the issue of material goods, and even how married couples are to operate in the world. If we who are married only live for one another and our happiness and meaning ends at the front door, then materialism far too often takes hold. But if husband and wife have single hearts, then the Lord’s priorities for material things will become the priorities for their home. Jesus said it best in Matthew 6:33 as a hallmark of a single heart: “But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you.” It’s been said that money is the number one cause of divorce. I beg to differ. Failure to trust one another regarding finances, where neither husband nor wife has a single heart can be a major cause of divorce. How a couple handles money reveals whether they have single hearts. So, Paul wraps up this section with another nugget of truth: “For the present form of this world is passing away.” As great as a young or a more seasoned marriage is, whether husband and wife have no children or 10, whether there is a 4 figure or 7 figure income, regardless of the material condition of their house or vehicles, everything is in the process of changing. We all get older. Our bodies break down. Morning by morning we begin to feel our age when we get out of bed. Those of us who have kids, they grow up a little more each day. And then come the grandkids and they make us tired. Material things wear out. Money takes a hike. How often do we have more month than money? These are all signs that we live in a fallen world. But Paul was looking forward to the return of Jesus. And he reminds those who are married of what they know so well, and the betrothed of what they are getting themselves into, to hold even the most precious things in this life--marriage and family--with an open hand. This world is dying. It, and we, are in desperate need of renewal. Ultimate salvation. All those who have a single heart long for it. And hallelujah! Our bridegroom is coming back. And he will make all things new. Can’t you just see that? Do you long for his return? In vv.32-35, Paul’s desire is to help the Corinthian believers, and us as well, maintain a single heart when he says he wants to “secure their undivided devotion to the Lord”. Here he gives the betrothed in their midst a dose of reality. Let’s look at these verses. “I want you to be free from anxieties. The unmarried man is anxious about the things of the Lord, how to please the Lord. But the married man is anxious about worldly things, how to please his wife, and his interests are divided. And the unmarried or betrothed woman is anxious about the things of the Lord, how to be holy in body and spirit. But the married woman is anxious about worldly things, how to please her husband. I say this for your own benefit, not to lay any restraint upon you, but to promote good order and to secure your undivided devotion to the Lord.” In a nutshell, Paul says, “You can choose what to be concerned about as a Christian.” Whether man or woman, a Christian single, with a single heart is has one concern: to please the Lord. I think of brother Rudy who left us for a great place of ministry awhile back. As a single man, he was content in his station of life and available to serve the Lord 24/7. He had no one to answer to. No one to check in with. If he was needed late into the night to minister to families, he was able to do that, without wondering what was going on with wife or children. On the other hand, a married man is to be concerned with pleasing his wife. And a wife is concerned about pleasing her husband. But when husband or wife is not concerned about this disaster most always follows. A bride to be and groom to be were sitting in Pastor Bill’s office. Both of them Christians. Both of them wanted to go the mission field. John was uber committed. That’s what Jane loved about him. Pastor Bill was excited about seeing John and Jane go to the Middle East. Until. Until Pastor Bill began to ask John about the concerns he had for his bride’s welfare. Though Pastor Bill wanted John and Jane to be missionaries to the Middle East, Pastor Bill sensed something was not quite right with John. And so Pastor Bill wisely began to probe John’s heart. And he asked this: “If Jane had health problems and you needed to come back from the Middle East to take care of her, what would you do?” John said he would make arrangements for his wife to return to the states but he would stay there. Pastor Bill was livid. He practically kicked them out of his office. He never supported them going to the Middle East. But they ended up finding an alternate way of getting there. To this day, they are there. And Jane is not doing well at all. This is a tragic example what a single heart does not look like. How many people in Christian service have destroyed their marriages and families because they have chosen to not please their husband or wife clinging to a distorted view of what their ministry field was? And this doesn’t only apply to those in as we call full-time Christian work. Paul made it clear--the husband needs to tend to his wife’s needs, and the wife to her husband’s. The term “roommate” comes to mind when that does not happen. See, when the husband neglects his wife’s needs and the wife her husband’s, they fail in what the Lord would have them do in their marriage. When Christians get married, her husband, his wife becomes their number 1 ministry. Not exclusive ministry, but the priority. But there are problems even in the godliest of marriages. Even at their best, neither husband nor wife are exactly perfect. On their wedding day, they are in front of the preacher. They exchange vows. They are pronounced husband and wife. They go on their honeymoon. Then they settle into life together. And he discovers that things not quite as how he remembered her when they were dating. And she discovers he has these disgusting habits! And on and on. What to do? Just what Paul said: Both husband and wife needs to maintain a single heart, an “undivided devotion to the Lord.” Gary Thomas wrote a great book describing what I call the life laboratory of marriage relationships. It is called “Sacred Marriage.” The subtitle is in the form of a question: “What If God Designed Marriage to Make Us Holy More Than to Make Us Happy?” As anyone who has been married for any length of time knows, marriage stretches a person. Reveals him or her. And should children come along, the revelation of who he or she is becomes that much more pronounced. God’s design for marriage is for him to use the husband in the wife’s life and vice versa to develop Christlike character in them, which is God’s goal for every Christian. Romans 8:28-29 tells us this: And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose. For those whom he foreknew he also predestined to be conformed to the image of his Son. If marriage is to be what God wants it to be, both husband and wife must have a single heart—undivided devotion to the Lord. Then in vv.36-38, we sort of come full circle. Again, Paul is very down to earth. He understands human nature. And he also understands one of the purposes for marriage: a holy outlet for sexual passion as he counseled in earlier in vv.8-9. Except for extremely rare occasions, God has given every person a desire for sexual activity. It is good and right within the context of marriage. Let’s read these verses to see what Paul is talking about: “If anyone thinks that he is not behaving properly toward his betrothed, if his passions are strong, and it has to be, let him do as he wishes: let them marry—it is no sin. But whoever is firmly established in his heart, being under no necessity but having his desire under control, and has determined this in his heart, to keep her as his betrothed, he will do well. So then he who marries his betrothed does well, and he who refrains from marriage will do even better.” Paul’s counsel is straight forward. In light of their economic circumstances and in his understanding of the soon coming of Christ, Paul invites the groom-to-be to re-think his lifelong commitment to his bride-to-be. Paul wants him to have undistracted devotion to the Lord. But if he finds that his natural desires become too much of a distraction, then it might be a good idea to get married. “He who marries his betrothed does well.” Again, it is an honorable thing to get married. It is normal and right to do so. However, if he heeds Paul’s advice and foregoes marriage and therefore sexual activity, then, “He will do even better.” The result, is that he will not consummate the marriage and their relationship will go no farther than their engagement. After having laid out his wise counsel to the betrothed, Paul now turns his attention to widows, and by application, widowers in vv.39-40: “A wife is bound to her husband as long as he lives. But if her husband dies, she is free to be married to whom she wishes, only in the Lord. Yet in my judgment she is happier if she remains as she is. And I think that I too have the Spirit of God.” Paul gives the green light to the widow and the widower: get married again. But with one stipulation--the same one that she would have if she or he were a single Christians: marry only another Christian. Paul makes this quite clear when he says: “Don’t be unequally yoked together with a non-Christian.” (2 Corinthians 6:14) But just because she is free to get married again does not mean she must. In Paul’s opinion, even a widow would be happier if she stays a widow. And Paul knows what he’s talking about by personal experience, for he was single when he wrote this. The widow is now free from marital responsibilities to serve the Lord with undivided devotion to him. And in v.40, Paul is simply saying that he wanted to remind the Corinthians that his words were not merely his opinion, but judgments informed by the Spirit. His counsel, indeed, was counsel, but it was wise. And wisdom is putting divine knowledge to practical use. So, what can we make of this passage, indeed, all of chapter 7? Paul’s bottom line is to have a single heart, undivided in his or her devotion to the Lord no matter the situation, relationship, or social status. That is the small picture. But there is a bigger picture: unity in the body of Christ. Imagine every follower of Jesus living a life with undistracted loyalty to him alone. What if every person in the body of Christ lived with an undistracted devotion to the Lord? What would that look like? How about a glimpse of the relationship God has within the members of the blessed Trinity? The Father, Son, Spirit, all giving honor, having unbroken fellowship with the other members within the One Divine Essence. All are involved as members of the Godhead in seeing to it that the will of God is carried out. I think of prayer. Romans 8 tells us that the Holy Spirit intercedes for us because the spiritual fact of life is that we don’t know how pray. In our limited understanding of a given situation it is impossible for us to know what to pray for. And not only does the Holy Spirit intercede for us; the Lord Jesus intercedes for the saints according to the will of God. What about the salvation of lost people on their way to hell, which at one point included even us who know Christ today? The Father planned and oversaw salvation come about. The Lord Jesus purchased salvation for sinners through his death and resurrection. The Holy Spirit convicts, gives new life, teaches, guides, and among so many other things, is the catalyst for our unity in the body of Christ. So what does unity look like for us, at Grace United espeically? What would it be like if we all had a single heart, living with an undivided devotion to the Lord? For one thing, we all would be concerned about one another’s welfare. We would step out of our comfort zone, for the sake of unity and undivided devotion to the Lord and actually ask one another how we are doing, and personally respond to the needs we hear about. We would pray for one another. Forgive one another. Love one another. We would seek to make disciples our priority as we ourselves diligently, obediently learn the ways of the Lord so that we might teach other followers of Jesus to obey everything he has taught us. In our marriages, as husbands and wives, with single hearts, we would seek to serve our husband, our wife, in ways the Lord would have us do. We would invest our material things in the kingdom of God and his righteousness, seeking it first, trusting him to meet our needs. As singles, we would be seek the Lord, concerned about what God’s concerns are for us, asking, “How can I serve the Lord today, right where I am?” As youth, how can you learn to honor your dad and mom while you are still living at home? Paul told young Timothy in 1 Timothy 4:12 that he is to be an example to others, in speech, in conduct, in love, in faith, in purity. Young person, you can apply this at home even before older siblings and parents. We can go on, but you can see how important a single heart is. A single heart brings everything together, in perfect unity. Isn’t that God’s desire, and design? What does it take to have a single heart-undivided devotion to the Lord? First, it takes having our sins forgiven in Christ. Jesus lived a perfect life, hung on a cross and offers forgiveness because of his sacrifice. He was the Lamb of God who takes away the sin of the world. His death and resurrection purchased salvation for us. We receive it as a gift of his grace. We turn from our sin and our way and go God’s way. Jesus said “come to me.” He is the Lord. Anyone who would receive forgiveness of sins must repent and believe the gospel: that our God reigns--there is no other God. That Christ paid the penalty for our sin. That we repent and enter into God’s family, and by the power of the Holy Spirit, live as God’s son, God’s daughter. As children of God, we gain a single heart by understanding who God is, who we are, and how we are to live in God’s world. That means we take God’s word into our lives as often as possible. Hear it. Read it. Study it. Memorize it. Meditate on it. God wants us to know him. Know his ways. His word is key to make that happen. As God talks to us through his word, we talk to him in prayer. There is much we can say here. But we can at least adore God by giving him praise. We confess our sins and turn from them -- that’s called confession and repentance: it’s not just for salvation any more. No, repentance is our course correction to keep us in fellowship with the Lord. Thanksgiving is another element in prayer. It is simply telling the Lord thanks for the specific things he has done in your life and mine. And then there’s supplication--that means we ask him for stuff. Jesus gives a prayer promise in John 15:7: “If you abide in me and my words abide in you, ask whatever you wish and it will be done for you.” You can take that to the bank. He will hear you and answer your prayers, as you abide in him and he abides in you, that the Father be glorified, that you bear much spiritual fruit—fruit that remains. We also develop a single heart by having true fellowship with other Christians. As I mentioned, let’s be prayerfully concerned with one another’s welfare. And there is nothing like telling people who don’t know Christ who Jesus is. Let’s tell others about the Christ who loved them and us, and that forgiveness of sins is offered to even the most hardened of sinners. We ought to think this way, “if God can save someone like me, surely he can save my family member. My friend. My neighbor. My classmate.” Author Philip Yancey paints a great picture of what unity can and should look like, as we strive to have a single heart--undivided devotion to the Lord and with this I’ll close: As I read accounts of the New Testament church, no characteristic stands out more sharply than diversity. Beginning with Pentecost, the Christian church dismantled the barriers of gender, race, and social class that had marked Jewish congregations. Paul, who as a rabbi had given thanks daily that he was not born a woman, slave, or Gentile, marveled over the radical change: "There is neither Jew nor Greek, slave nor free, male nor female, for you are all one in Christ Jesus." One modern Indian pastor told me, "Most of what happens in Christian churches, including even miracles, can be duplicated in Hindu and Muslim congregations. But in my area only Christians strive, however ineptly, to mix men and women of different castes, races, and social groups. That's the real miracle." Diversity complicates rather than simplifies life. When we come together as a congregation, we can engage with one another. The church gathering is where infants and grandparents, unemployed and executives, immigrants and blue bloods can come together.” Yancey continues, “Just yesterday I sat sandwiched between an elderly man hooked up to a puffing oxygen tank and a breastfeeding baby who grunted loudly and contentedly throughout the sermon. Where else can we find that mixture?” Indeed. Only to the degree where we all have a single heart--undivided devotion to the Lord is the degree where we can not only experience unity but will truly desire it. For the sake of Christ, may we have a single heart, regardless of our station in life.